What's Up, Pussycat? Page 5

  “Thanks.” I clinked my bottle against his. “Happy New Year.”

  Karl bent until his face was inches away. His gray eyes met mine and he whispered the words back. “Happy New Year.”

  A puff of warm breath brushed my nose as he leaned in even closer and brought our lips together. It was a soft, barely-there peck on the lips, but to me it was filled with promise, and it flooded me with warmth as I thought about what was to come. The New Year had brought a new start for me and I couldn’t wait to see where it went.

  Chapter Ten

  A long silence followed the kiss, and I struggled to think of something to say. I didn’t often find myself so tongue-tied, but nervousness rendered me speechless. Finally, I remembered to ask a question. If I could get Karl to talk, it would prompt me to say something in return.

  “What do your family think of you doing musicals?”

  “My mum and my little sister love it. They’ve been to see Grease three times. They came to Cats a few times when we were performing here, as well. They wanted to come to one of the London shows, but couldn’t afford it. My mum works as a secretary, and my sister’s in her last year of school.”

  “What about your dad?”

  “The less said about him the better.” Karl wrinkled his nose. “Mum and Dad are divorced. They were always fighting when I was a kid, and when I came out and Dad called me a raging poof, Mum completely lost it with him. He moved out a few months later. Mum’s got a boyfriend now. He’s an accountant. Boring as hell, but he treats her like she’s royalty, and that’s what matters, right?”

  I grinned as he rambled on. He didn’t need much persuasion to talk and once he got going, he became animated and entertaining. Eventually, he stopped mid-sentence. “I’m sorry, you must be sick of hearing my voice. I don’t know when to stop sometimes. I’m nervous because… well, I don’t want to fuck this up.”

  “You won’t. I’m enjoying listening to you, honestly.” I reached for his hand and squeezed it. “I’m quite capable of telling you to shut up, you know.”

  “I wish you would. I talk too much. Why don’t you tell me more about you? When we were in London, I was so busy rattling on about myself, I doubt you got a word in.”

  I laughed. “Yeah, but at least it gave me something else to think about besides my stage-fright. That got much better in the end.”

  “You weren’t tempted to do another show?”

  I shook my head. “I did what I wanted. When I saw the ad for Mistoffelees, I thought if I could do that, I’d make Andrew proud. I achieved that. Being on the stage isn’t really me. I did it a long time ago when Andrew and I were first together, but he was always so much better, and it meant so much to him. It only meant anything to me when I was doing it for him.”

  A frown wrinkled Karl’s brow, and he held my hand more tightly. “You must still miss him horribly.”

  “Yeah, I do. But I can think about him without getting upset. I can remember how happy we were, and all the fun things we did. I talked to him a little while ago, and told him I was ready to move on. He’d be happy for me. His mum told me the same thing.”

  Karl gulped. “That’s so sad, and sweet at the same time. I can’t imagine what you must have been through. I’ve never lost anybody like that. I’ve never cared about anybody that much either.” He closed his eyes and pulled a face. “I’m sorry. I’ll just shut up.”

  “It’s okay. You can talk about it. I’m fine.” I pulled my hand free and lifted it to touch his face.

  He opened his eyes in surprise. “I guess I should be honored you chose me to go on your first date with. I can’t imagine why you would pick me.”

  “You’re funny and kind and attractive,” I blurted. “And I think there’s a lot more to you than you show people. I want to get to know you properly. I didn’t get a great deal of chance to do that when we were in London, even when we started to be friends.”

  “Well, let’s hope you like what you find out.” He smiled again. “So, how come you’re out alone on New Year’s Day, anyway?”

  “I’m not alone. I’m with you.” I chuckled. “I didn’t have anything to do. I was with my parents on Christmas Day, which was just hilarious. The silver spoons were well and truly out. They invited me today, but I excused myself. I saw Andrew’s parents yesterday, and James and Abby last night. Today, I was just doing my own thing. What about you? You looked down in the dumps when I saw you.”

  “I’m fine. Well, I am now I’ve got my hair of the dog.” Karl grimaced as he gestured to his beer. “I can’t actually remember seeing in the New Year, but I’m sure I did. The hangover this morning was brutal.”

  “Serves you right, then. Did you go to a party?”

  “Yeah, a few of the Grease cast went to a party at Maurice’s. Have you ever been to his house?”

  I shook my head.

  “He lives in the back of beyond. It’s a converted farmhouse, stuck out in a field. Me and a couple of others got a lift out there, and got a taxi home. Cost a bloody fortune at two in the morning.”

  “How is Maurice?”

  “He celebrated more than anyone. He’s getting married. Apparently, he’s been with his man for twenty years, waiting for it to be legal.”

  “That’s brilliant.”

  “I know this is a bit soon, and by the end of today you’ll probably change your mind and be glad to see the back of me. But if you can put up with me until February, you could be my plus one.” Karl’s eyes twinkled and his face flushed.

  “I’d like that.” Rather than be irritated, the more time I spent with Karl, the more I liked him, and I found his self-deprecating attitude endearing. “Even if I’ve had enough of you by the end of today, we could still go as friends.”

  When his face fell, I elbowed him. “I’m teasing you. I like being with you. I haven’t enjoyed myself this much in a long time.”

  It was true, I thought. It had been too long since I spent time with a man who wasn’t only a friend, like James. It had been too long since I’d had a date, and thought about what might happen later, or tomorrow, or next week. I’d lived from one day to the next for almost two years, and only in the last few weeks had things changed.

  I spent the rest of the day with Karl. We stayed in the bar for hours, talking. When people started ordering food, we decided to eat, too. When some people left, we found a quiet corner to sit around a small round table.

  “What are you having?” I studied the battered menu. “I fancy the steak panini. I’m not that hungry. I don’t want a full meal.”

  “I’ll have the same. We could get fries and onion rings and share them.” Karl sniggered suddenly. “Maybe not onion rings.”

  “Well, if we both eat them, it won’t matter.” I grinned. “It’s like garlic. If both people have it, you don’t notice it.”

  “Okay. I’ll order.” He went to the bar to place the food order, and returned with two more beers. “It’ll be half an hour. They’re run off their feet with the crowd in here.”

  We sipped our drinks and chatted while we waited for the food. The steak paninis were delicious, complimented by the fries and onion rings. I hung back on the onion rings until Karl had eaten three, struggling not to laugh when he paused with another one halfway to his mouth.

  “You are having some of these, aren’t you?”

  “No, I changed my mind.” I shrugged and stuffed a couple more fries into my mouth.

  “But now you won’t want to kiss me again!” His eyes widened in mock horror, and he slapped a hand to his chest. “You’re doing it on purpose. You’re using it as an excuse to not kiss me.”

  I snorted. “I’m just teasing you.”

  “You’re doing that a lot. I suppose I can’t blame you. You’re getting your own back for my idiotic behavior when we first met.”

  “I am.” Grinning, I grabbed an onion ring. “You’re so easy to wind up.”

  “I know. I can dish it out, but I’m not so good at taking it.” He moved his le
g under the table and bumped his knee against mine. “Who’d have thought we’d end up spending the day together like this? I thought after that disaster in London, you’d have kept your distance.”

  “I’m sorry about that. I just wasn’t ready. I am now.” I met his gaze and held it. For once, he had nothing to say in response. He stared back, unblinking, a look of longing in his eyes. I smiled and broke the eye contact, turning my attention back to my plate. Nerves made my hand shake as I picked up another onion ring, but I couldn’t wait to be alone with him later.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Shall we go for a walk?” Karl suggested, when we finished the meal. “I ate too much. I don’t want to sit hunched up much longer.”

  I finished my last mouthful of beer, and reached for my jacket. “Okay.”

  We left the bar and wandered aimlessly along the streets, close together with our arms occasionally brushing. Karl grasped my hand and I squeezed his in approval. “Where are we going?”

  “Nowhere in particular. I thought of heading for my place for coffee, but maybe that’s too soon.”

  I glanced up at him. “I quite fancy a coffee. We’re actually pretty close to my place.”

  “Are you sure?” He pulled me to a halt and turned to face me. “It’s the house you shared with Andrew, isn’t it?”

  “Yes. It’s fine. If it’s okay with you. I mean, maybe you’d rather not. We could just go to your place if you, um…” I broke off and waited.

  “Your place is fine.”

  “Okay. Great.” Heaving a sigh of relief, I led the way. We turned into my street and I pulled out my keys as we approached the small house. Pushing my nervousness aside, I invited Karl in and headed for the kitchen to make coffee. He hovered, hands in his pockets, while the kettle boiled. Once again, neither of us spoke until I poured the drinks.

  Karl took his mug and sipped. “Thanks. This is a nice house.”

  “You’ve only seen the kitchen.” Shrugging out of my jacket, I held out my hand to take Karl’s from him. He put down his mug again to take off his hat and coat. “I’ll hang these up and we’ll sit in the living room.” I led the way, my gaze immediately drawn to the photo of Andrew and me. Perhaps I should have put it away, along with the others I’d now moved into the bedroom. But I liked looking at it. Besides, I hadn’t expected to bring anyone back here. What if it upset Karl? What if… something happened? It would be like Andrew was watching. Nerves returning with full force, I took a seat on the sofa, half turned away from the picture.

  “That’s a lovely photo.” Karl bent to peer more closely at the framed print.

  “Yeah. Um, I should probably have, um, put it away somewhere by now.”

  “Why? You loved him. You were together a long time. It’s only right you should have his picture up.” He took a seat, leaving a reasonable gap between us, and gave me a warm smile.

  Immediately, I relaxed. “Sorry if I’m being weird. It’s kind of like stage fright. I’ve never brought anyone else here.”

  “I know that. We don’t have to do anything. I just came for coffee, right?”

  “Right.” I sipped my coffee and let my gaze wander over Karl again. He looked so ordinary, with his hair its natural color and neatly cut, his gray eyes warm and friendly. A simple blue sweater with jeans was a sharp contrast to some of the loud outfits he’d worn in London. “What made you change your appearance? You said it was time to be honest.”

  “Yeah. I, um, I looked in the mirror one day and didn’t like myself anymore.” Karl shrugged and smiled wryly. “I started bleaching my hair when I was eighteen. I didn’t dare before then. I think I told you once I hid who I was and dated some girls. I even kissed them to make it believable.” He laughed and gave a mock shudder. “They loved me. They thought I was a gentleman because I didn’t try to grope them. Then after the exams when I turned up at school with bleached hair and makeup, and some outrageous outfit with pink and yellow in it, flouncing around like I was on the stage, everybody got it.”

  I laughed. “I’d love to have seen their faces.”

  “Yeah, the boys weren’t that impressed. Nor were the teachers. I was flouting school rules by not wearing the uniform, and unnatural hair colors weren’t allowed. But to answer your question, I was playing a role with all that. I did it for years, and after I talked to you in London, I realized I didn’t want to be that person anymore. I wanted to be real.”

  “I like the real you.” I edged closer until our knees bumped, and met Karl’s eyes. He put down his coffee cup on the nearby table, and laid his hand on my knee. Our gaze held, Karl’s filled with longing. I leaned in, closing the gap between us until our lips brushed. I lifted my hand to his neck, and my fingers brushed the silky strands of his new short cut. I slid my fingers around to the nape, encouraging him to kiss me again. Our lips clung in a warm caress, exploring gently without tongues. My eyes fluttered closed and I savored the moment, comparing it to the frantic, awkward fumbling in London when we’d both had a few drinks. We’d mashed our lips together, squirming and grasping, fighting to get Karl out of his lycra catsuit. Then I froze and it was over.

  I broke away, my lips parting on a laugh. “I’m sorry. I just remembered the last time we did this.”

  “In the bar?” Karl’s brow furrowed.

  “No, in London. When we were in costume.”

  He grinned. “That bloody costume was a nightmare. Then again, at the time it was probably a good thing. If I’d been able to get out of it quicker, things would have been more awkward.”

  “Yeah, probably. Sorry,” I repeated.

  Karl’s grin widened. “Do you still have your costume?”

  “Yes, I didn’t want to part with it. Why, do you want me to dress up in it?” Teasing, I waggled my eyebrows.

  “Maybe one day.” He flushed. “You did look good in it. I don’t know how I stopped myself following you around with my tongue hanging out.”

  More laughter eased the tension, and we finished our coffees, reminiscing about the shows. When I took the coffee mugs back to the kitchen, Karl followed. “Maybe I should go now. It’s been an awesome day.”

  “Please don’t.” I turned abruptly from the sink to find Karl standing close to me. I looked up and met his eyes. I longed for more. I’d been alone for so long, and finally I felt able to reach out and take what was in front of me. I wanted to kiss him, and hold him, and not let go. I wanted to feel that he wanted me. “I’m not very good at this, but I don’t want you to go yet.”

  “I’m not very good at it either. And I’m concerned I might overstep the mark again.”

  “You won’t. Not this time.” I reached for him and slid my arms around his waist, drawing him closer. “Where were we, before I interrupted it by laughing?”

  He lowered his head, bringing our lips so close that when he spoke again, they brushed repeatedly. “I think we were about here.” He shuffled his feet forward, pressing me back against the sink with his body. I closed my eyes as his mouth covered mine, this time parting my lips to encourage him to kiss me properly. His tongue slid in, eager, but gentle at the same time. I hummed my approval and kissed him back, breathing fast through my nose as our lips pressed harder together, tongues teasing and tasting.

  My heart raced, and my cock filled, rapidly responding to the growing urgency of the kiss. Karl’s growing hardness nudged my stomach, encouraging my arousal, and I held on tighter, squeezing and massaging his back and shoulders. He broke the kiss to breathe, then ducked his head to nibble his way along my jaw to my neck, teeth carefully grazing a sensitive spot beneath my ear. I trembled and a soft moan burst from my lips.

  “Is this okay?” Karl murmured against my skin.

  “Yes… please…” Shivering from the gentle nibbling at my neck, I rose on the balls of my feet, lessening the height difference so I could feel Karl’s erection against mine. I slid my hands down his back to his ass. The last time I’d touched him like that, he’d been slippery-smooth in lycra. This
time my palms caressed soft, worn denim, molded tight to his buttocks. I squeezed and pulled him in harder against me. He groaned in my ear, hips gyrating.

  “Shit, Fin. I want to touch you. Can I?”

  “Uh huh.” Breathless, I took my hands off him as he pulled back a few inches, just enough to get his hands between us. He fumbled with my zipper, impatient to get into my jeans. I whimpered in frustration when his knuckles brushed my dick, still trapped in too-tight underwear. I pushed his hands away and yanked open my fly, all nervousness long gone. I yearned to be touched, and the few seconds it took to free me from my clothes were too long. Finally, my cock sprang free, pushing into Karl’s hand. He gripped lightly, rubbing his thumb over the leaking tip, and I moaned again, struggling to focus as I unfastened his jeans.

  “Fuck! Yes!” Karl braced one hand on the counter beside me, bucking his hips as I wrapped my hand around his erection. We stroked together, clumsily jerking each other in unison, desperate for release. Head down, I watched my hand sliding up and down his slick shaft, rolling the foreskin back to reveal the swollen purple head. I licked my lips, wondering what he would taste like, but hesitant to drop to my knees and try. Instead, I moved my hand faster, drawing another louder groan of pleasure from him. He quickened the pace of his stroking too, and I clutched at him with my free hand, legs trembling as my orgasm shook me. How long had it been? A minute? Less? My face warmed.

  “Shit. Sorry.” Keeping my head down, I concentrated on bringing him off, relieved when it took only a few more strokes.

  He chuckled breathlessly and reached for a roll of paper towels to clean up. “I wasn’t far behind. I think we both needed that.”

  “It’s been too long.” I lifted my head and met his eyes again. His pupils were blown, cheeks flushed. I looked away again and grabbed some of the paper towels. We cleaned up quickly and tucked ourselves away. Gradually, our breathing calmed, and when Karl leaned close again to press a gentle kiss to my cheek, I slid my arms around his waist. “Thank you.”